how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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