It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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