You're my little dorito
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You're like the curious george of whores
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
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