You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
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Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
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I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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