Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
