Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Randomize
