tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
