We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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