Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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