Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
