My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Let's paint friendship bongs
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
