how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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