holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize