6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
