If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
