I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize
