so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
