You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Randomize
