I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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