I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize