Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
the day after is always just damage control
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
