we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
