In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
