Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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