5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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