Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
