My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
