I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
