i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
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