We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
he puts the penis in happiness.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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