Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
