your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Randomize
