I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
