Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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