dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Damn victory sex feels great
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
