2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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