is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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