im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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