i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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