Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize