In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
