do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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