Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
