Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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