eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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