The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Randomize
