This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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