Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
not ubering you a puppy
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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