he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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