He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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