So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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